Sunday, January 8, 2012

Askari’s ignorance of Sister Nancy is no defence



Peter Kimani

On Wednesday night, about 14,000 results filtered to the fore when one googled the name Nancy Baraza, our spanking new Deputy Chief Justice now caught in what the media are calling "gun drama."
But by Thursday morning, the Internet search returned some 80,000 files — more than four times the initial results, an affirmation of the growing popularity of our Deputy CJ.
Madam Nancy — let’s drop the formalities and simply call her Sister Nancy — has the rare ability of switching from stern coldness to melting warmth, as she did during that public interview when she was interviewed for her current job.
In that sense, she has a great dramatic sense, which makes claims of her starring role in that "gun drama" even more alluring. But I think her eyes are the most treasured assets in her acting prowess, for they can shine brightly like the morning sun, or dim with bored indifference.
I suspect her eyes may have been in dimming mode on New Year’s Eve, perhaps fatigued from the festivities of the season, even from her pain from the undisclosed ailment that she sought to relieve through medication.
I am presuming, of course, that Sister Nancy was in no mood to drive, and so was chauffeured, with her security detail in tow, in a vehicle whose registration left no doubt that she was serikali.
So you can imagine Sister Nancy’s irritation when she was motioned to the side by some female guard who sought to search her bag, and her person, as though she does not know who serikali is.
Even under such provocation, all Sister Nancy did was to gently pinch the nosy guard, just as a parent may squeeze the lobe of a child hard of hearing.
"You must know people," is all Sister Nancy said. She did not say "people of importance" but merely "people." Again, this is down-to-earth humility.
Frayed nerves
I totally understand Sister Nancy alarm. As she explained in her statement, she merely panicked from the female guard’s insistence that she searches her.
It’s no exaggeration that buzzing metal detectors and crackling walkie-talkies can generate enough static to alarm frayed nerves like Sister Nancy’s, who is reported to have had unspecified security scares in the past.
Moreover, since she had only returned from the chemist to pick some medication, this is adequate mitigation that she may not have been in the "right frame of mind" to be harassed endlessly by a security guard "who does not know people."
Still, Sister Nancy did not take the law into her own hands as most of us would have been tempted. She instead marshalled her bodyguard, much the same way a bullied kid in school parades an older sibling as her measure of security, and pointed at the female guard who had been harassing her.
But the bodyguard, presumably a man, decided the walkie-talkie and metal detectors did not merit his intervention and returned to the car.
On bended knees
I’m not sure if that’s when the "gun drama" took place, for the rest of the events happened rather fast. Sister Nancy is reported to have returned with "something," which she pointed at the guard, which prompted her to kneel and beg her to spare her life.
I opted not to use the guard’s name because we simply call her ilk askari, or even seek to know how she failed to know people like Sister Nancy, who have fine education, money, class and status.
I suspect Sister Nancy’s life is guided by the legal maxim ignorance of the law is no defence. And since she is the new custodian of the law, all that crawl on the face of the earth must know her famous face.
But she forgot the only way "to know people" like her is by watching TV, or reading newspapers, a privilege out of reach for most askaris.
FEEDBACK
Man eateth where he worketh,
by any means necessary
I’m writing to wish you happy 2012, and to appreciate the good work that you have been doing in this column. You create humour out of normal life situations. A recent piece, Eating Money From the Pocket, Just Like Peanuts, tickled me very much. A similar situation befell me at Yukos, the Kitengela tavern where you were recently short-changed.
The pub’s owner is my friend, the waiters are good and so is the meat. But there is always a way some extra coins are sneaked into the bills, perhaps to confirm the adage, "man eateth where he worketh."
Ngala Oloitiptip, Nairobi
***
Students at the Embakasi branch of a popular driving school are being left holding the short end of the stick by corrupt instructors and administrators. Students are welcomed very well on the first day but once they pay all the fees, a secretary demands bribes before lessons are scheduled.
Those who do not comply are allocated lessons in time slots that are most inconvenient, and driving lessons do not commence before instructors are paid Sh1,500 bribes, plus daily supply of breakfast, lunch and supper.
The instructors, who are all male, also demand sexual favours from female students. It’s a waste of time reporting these malpractices because the company is managed by relatives who condone the exploitation. Where shall we turn for help?
Concerned Student, Embakasi
To avoid battery, keep bread
flowing, even without butter
My heart goes out to the Nyeri man reported to be fleeing an abusive marriage.
His bandaged face and hands bespoke the trauma that he has undergone at the hands of his wife of six months.
He said the violence meted out on him was prompted by the alleged sale of the family radio (it was not clear who owned the set), but which his wife thought was critical for the man’s survival as a gospel musician.
Apparently, he uses the radio to test his music to entice buyers, and the wife thought selling the gadget would diminish the man’s prospects of making decent sales.
The man did not verify the claims that he had sold the radio, or how he planned to continue selling his music without a testing kit.
Since he was filmed holding a radio set, he needed to come clean if he had recovered it after the battery.
Defenceless spouse
What the man’s travails should teach all menfolk is that spouses may allow them to do foolish things as long as they do not interrupt the flow of bread, even without butter.
But what the man failed to explain was why he was unable to defend himself during the assault.

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