Palaver - 01.06.11

Palaver has long suspected that the initial studies on brain tumors and their possible links to mobile phones were wrong, therefore the WHO’s statement on Wednesday was a validation. It would explain why our so-called leaders often display behaviour not akin to hippos on a night-long feeding frenzy. Why else would they regard their privileged positions as an excuse to fill their pockets with taxpayers’ money, block the nomination of one Dr Willy Mutunga and ignore Bills that would, if passed, open up new political opportunities for them? Because they spend so much time taking into their phones, mostly to themselves, Palaver concludes that cell phone radio waves have fried their brains!
The Madaraka Day celebrations at Nyayo Stadium are a national event, not a political party jamboree. So why on earth does PNU insist on dulling the occasion with elderly mothers bedecked in fading party colours? Everyone knows who occupies the House on the Hill, and so these ladies — no offence intended — are an insult to the symbolism and meaning of Madaraka Day.
Palaver would say the same if ODM flooded the stadium with old women sporting orange scarves ringed with... you got it... oranges.
Palaver suspects there is frenetic activity going on within the "G7 alliance" over the revelation that one William Samoei Ruto may dump the son of Jomo. Palaver once said that a prophet is rarely respected in his own country and this has been proven right; Veep Kalonzo long ago declared himself the master of "kupita kati kati yao" (passing through the middle).
If indeed Samoei has seen the light and wants to go-it-alone, the Veep will suddenly become the most wanted prize since the initials "G7" first appeared in print. After all, both Ruto and Uhuru desperately need the Kamba vote to make it to State House. Who’s laughing now?
And finally...
After sleeping through the furore over the maize shortage, NCPB suddenly woke up on Tuesday with a report projecting a maize deficit of 1.3 million tonnes. You can bet its newfound vocal cords have been stimulated by unseen forces with links to cartels that control maize importation and their cohorts in Government. Prepare for a deluge of maize at Mombasa port.
—Editorial@standardmedia co.ke