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Sunday, December 5, 2010

What if WikiLeaks were to release the latest US cable on Kenya?

By OTIENO OTIENO,  (email the author)

Posted Saturday, November 20 2010 at 12:40

Reports that WikiLeaks could release 1,821 US diplomatic cables on Kenya have predictably got our leaders in a foul mood considering the unflattering manner in which the secret memos have depicted their counterparts elsewhere.
If WikiLeaks were to let us in on the latest cable on Kenya, I imagine it could read something like this:
From: The US embassy in Nairobi.
To: The US State Department in Washington DC.
Subject: Kenya Country Outlook
Status: Top Secret
Kenya remains our ever-too-willing ally in the war against terrorism in this Godforsaken and lunatics-infested part of the world aptly named the Horn of Africa.
Its security agents have recently kidnapped its own citizens and renditioned them to the Guantanamo next door, Uganda, to face charges over the July 11 Kampala bombings.
Until some radical judge made a rather hare-brained ruling, Kenya swung the door of its courts open to try Somalia pirates caught on international waters on our behalf for a pittance to paint the walls and recarpet the floors of its dilapidated court buildings.
The general population has since recovered from the 2008 post-election mass hysteria that saw neighbour butcher neighbour because he or she belonged to the other tribe.
This has given a sense of stability in the only country in the world ruled by Two Principals and an international prefecture of Kofi Annan and Luis Moreno-Ocampo.
But one would be getting ahead of himself to be optimistic about the future of Kenya given the kind of clowns it has for leaders.
Not so long ago, they publicly quarrelled over anything under the sun, including carpets and toilets.
Their grasp of issues and sense of priority often comes off as upside down.
Some are so idle that they even find time to clarify issues around their families on national television or call their people chicken poo.
Others walk with their foot in the mouth and might make a slur on gay people today and seek to clarify it tomorrow.
But the immediate threat to Kenya’s peace is the expected backlash and fallout from Moreno-Ocampo’s announcement that he will be asking judges of the International Criminal Court to put away six powerful people in jail over the post-election murder of the innocents.
The Kenyan warlords may not control Slobodan Milosevic’s army or possess the burrowing abilities of Saddam Hussein.
But it is feared they may try to use their sharp tongues and deep pockets to light a tribal hellfire or build a firewall around them.
It is set to be a long two weeks for Kenya.


  1. Damm let em release dha cable n knw dha true of dha matter/wikileak 4lyf


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