How to know that you are a LUO in church

The Kenyan DAILY POSTJokes23:04

1. You exit your car and throw your keys to the usher at the gate coz you think he is a valet

2. You walk up to an usher and ask him where the VIP section is

3. During scripture readings you whip out your iPad because your bible is an e-book

4. You tip the pastors and usher after the service.

5. You hire private tutors so your children can have Sunday school at home

6. You hire a guy to film you during the service

7. When asked to turn to a particular song in the hymn book, you start scrolling thru your iPod touch and ask your neighbor if they think that song is available on iTunes

8. You tip the worship team so they can play your special requests.

9. Despite protests, you always insist on giving your offering as a large cardboard replica of a cheque which you present to the pastor in front of the whole congregation.

The Kenyan DAILY POST