Palaver

Mwangi M just won’t let this matter rest. First he claims the City Council of Nairobi cannot stand graffiti depicting vulturine politicians, but are dead silent about the ‘Waititu 4 governor’ writings on every wall around the city. He poses: "Or has he bought advertising space?" Mwangi goes on to see the lighter side of the Gitobu Imanyara troubles. Gitobu was reportedly heard telling a rally in Meru rally that "mimi sitishiki". That was not the same man in Parliament who looked clearly shaken. Anyone would.

Italy is broke, everyone knows that! How come then the Italian Government has signed a successful deal with Nuovo Trasporto Viaggiatori, a private firm to build a sleek 298kph train that roars out in five days time? It will connect Milan, Rome, and Naples. Meanwhile, the Embakasi-CBD train reportedly stalled after running out of fuel recently. And we draw up plans dated 2030 when we still offer to ferry Ugandan, Rwandese, Burundi and Sudanese goods on a rail track built by Indian coolies just over 100 years ago, and take two hours to crawl (in any car) between Bomas of Kenya and Nyayo Stadium and Nyayo Stadium to Donholm Roundabout! Get real folks.

Kenyan single ladies need to start knowing people. One Jack Zuma just added one more to his homestead. Next door to him is a dashing pilot and bachelor called Lt General Seretse Khama Ian Khama. Among other things, President Khama got a three per cent salary increase last week and will now earn Sh5.5 million per annum. And he is looking for a wife who will not break the shock absorbers of his limo, crash through the palace door, fair skinned, slim and tall. So stop injecting those things into your behind, and start calling down south.

And finally…

Did you know that on some CIA web listing under the banner: "International organization participation" Kenya is member of: ACP, AfDB, AU C, EADB, ECA, FAO, G-15, G-77, IAEA, IBRD, ICAO, ICCt (signatory), ICRM, IDA, IFAD, IFC, IFRCS, IGAD, ILO, IMF, IMO, ITUC, Interpol, IOC, IOM, ISO, ITU, MINURSO, MONUC, NAM, OPCW, UN, UNAMSIL, UNCTAD, UNESCO, UNIDO, UNIKOM, UNMEE, UNMIBH, UNMIK, UNMISET, UNMOP, UNU, UPU, WCO, WHO, WIPO, WMO, WTO, WTrO? Okay, do we get paid for sitting on all these bodies? If not, why the hell not?

editorial@standardmedia.co.ke