That was too much ado about nothing

By Politically incorrectLooking back at the events of the past month, a stranger would have thought that Kenya would grind to a standstill the moment the Ocampo Six appeared in The Hague.
The brouhaha, hysterics, raw fear and sheer discord that some of them and their band of supporters created seemed to suggest that as soon as they landed at The Hague, they would be led to the gallows and hanged.
In fact, it seemed as if the entire Rift Valley and Central Kenya were headed to the ICC or that the country was going through a presidential campaign.
This is something future suspects should emulate. It would make for wonderful news for, say, those implicated in the Goldenberg saga to hold a series of rallies countrywide
The media, of course, hyped the whole circus to fever pitch and milked every moment of drama to the maximum. From way back and right to the appearance of the Ocampo Six before the ICC, their every moment has been broadcast to an attentive nation that is permanently hooked on a noisy and messy political diet, especially that of the macabre kind.
Forty MPs stepped forward and left for The Hague in solidarity with their comrades. They all wore caps emblazoned with Kenyan colours, singing long forgotten patriotic songs in an off-key manner, not at all different from the exertions of a kindergarten choir. And yet one gets the distinct feeling that is not exactly the sort of PR that Brand Kenya desired.
And yet for all their gymnastics, ICC photographers ignored and gave them a blackout, meaning their constituents missed watching their gallant sons and daughters dozing — a condition that afflicts those in political employment — before the judges on TV.
Prison vanThe whole thing turned out to be such an anticlimax: A female judge who looked as motherly as your favourite aunt and a prosecutor who sounded so meek you would have mistaken him for a church pastor. No thunder, no sign of gallows, no mean prison warders standing beside the accused with handcuffs in full view of cameras, no prison van parked outside the court surrounded by a posse of crack paramilitary personnel, no riot police to stop the 40 MPs from heckling the judges.
But the lack of drama notwithstanding, an MP from central Kenya was meanwhile almost beating the hell out of City Council staff because a venue for welcoming the Ocampo Six had been denied. Yes, welcome them back; anything to keep the drama going.
And all the while, chickens continued scratching the ground, cows mooed and matatus overlapped, honked and broke the law as they always have. Our thieves and pickpockets went about without a care in the world. Cops gunned down the odd gangster, IDPs continued squatting in their leaky tents and Kenyans got married, pregnant and divorced.
In short, life went on, as it always shall. So why have we been going nuts?