Monday, April 1, 2013

APRIL FOOL 1


MPs, Senators to get Sh3 billion for breakfast, lunch


However, you ought to know that MPs and Senators can’t survive on the taxable Sh520,000 salary a month.
“I thought after spending millions to campaign for Senate, I would earn enough to buy a Sh20 million home in Karen or Runda and also purchase my dream car, BMW X5. But it makes no sense what we are being treated to,” lamented a senator from Rift Valley on condition of confidentiality.
A catering officer in the National Assembly said the MPs had proposed that at each sitting for lunch or dinner, they be entitled to a free bottle of wine or spirit of their choice. “There is no way Treasury can stop us, not even Ms Serem. We are independent just like the Executive,” an MP boasted.

Terms of work
He argued that members of the Judiciary such as magistrates and judges now have better terms of work and have access to three per cent mortgage and car loans.  “This is a war we will fight to the end, in fact there is already a proposal that small fridges stocked with soft drinks and water will be set up at strategic places in the two Chambers. We will not allow to be served with bottled water like the last parliaments,’’ he added.
Separately The Standard established that some of the new MPs are also mulling over how to stop the live coverage because they claim it exposes their limitations in debating and also reveals their absence from sittings.

However, you ought to know that MPs and Senators can’t survive on the taxable Sh520,000 salary a month.
“I thought after spending millions to campaign for Senate, I would earn enough to buy a Sh20 million home in Karen or Runda and also purchase my dream car, BMW X5. But it makes no sense what we are being treated to,” lamented a senator from Rift Valley on condition of confidentiality.
A catering officer in the National Assembly said the MPs had proposed that at each sitting for lunch or dinner, they be entitled to a free bottle of wine or spirit of their choice. “There is no way Treasury can stop us, not even Ms Serem. We are independent just like the Executive,” an MP boasted.
Terms of work
He argued that members of the Judiciary such as magistrates and judges now have better terms of work and have access to three per cent mortgage and car loans.  “This is a war we will fight to the end, in fact there is already a proposal that small fridges stocked with soft drinks and water will be set up at strategic places in the two Chambers. We will not allow to be served with bottled water like the last parliaments,’’ he added.
Separately The Standard established that some of the new MPs are also mulling over how to stop the live coverage because they claim it exposes their limitations in debating and also reveals their absence from sittings.


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