The Cutting Edge

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By THE WATCHMAN
Posted  Thursday, June 27  2013 at  19:00

HONDAS BETTER THAN SUZUKI. The government’s decision to buy Suzuki motorbikes for traffic police officers, in an apparent cost-cutting measure, has not gone down well with Kamichore Mutindira.

Says he: “I am disheartened because the ‘thin’ motorbike actually demeans the officer riding it, as he cannot be differentiated from the typicalboda boda rider. The huge Honda bike was not only prestigious, but was also the right one for the job. The authorities should just restore the Hondas,” he pleads.

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BANK SHOULD EXPAND. Its recent rebranding now apparently complete, the National Bank of Kenya needs to expand its branch network, especially in Nairobi, where its presence remains rather minimal, says Wollen Morara.

The areas the bank should target include the Industrial Area and the vast Embakasi zone in the Eastlands.

Today, he reports, there are only two branches in the area, one of which is at the JKIA. He lists the Taj Mall and the North Airport as being among the most ideal locations.

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SHORT-CHANGED. One not to ignore a bargain, Luke Mulunda, who runs a small enterprise in Nairobi, signed up for the Orange monthly unlimited Internet package for Sh3,000, which was meant to support at least five users at a go.

It went well until two months ago when the speed dropped dramatically without any explanation.

“As a result, it can no longer support even a single user at a reasonable loading speed. Is someone playing tricks?” asks Luke, whose contact is Tel 0733737337 or email: lmulunda@gmail.com.

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BODAS MOST DANGEROUS. Boda boda motorcyclists in Nairobi and other towns are becoming a worse menace than matatus, says James Githinji.

During traffic jams, the riders get rather reckless, sometimes suddenly cutting across the roads to get ahead of motor vehicles.

By thinking that the drivers will be anticipating their daredevil moves, the riders often cause accidents, endangering their own lives.

“No wonder there are more motorcycle casualties than all other accidents combined.”

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DAZZLING SMILE. On his regular visits to Alliance Girls High School, Kikuyu, Gachiengo Gitau says, his most memorable moment is interacting with a guard at the main gate, who often dazzles all with a smile, as he gives directions. 

Unlike many who whine daily about the positions they hold, the man is always calm and occasionally throws in a word of advice to a child on the necessity of scoring an A in the final exam.

“I always leave the gate hoping there was a way his free spirit could be harnessed for posterity.”

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PLEA HILARIOUS. With his landline, No 3870949 out of order for a very long time, a Nairobi subscriber says he had a good laugh when he heard that Telkom Kenya needs Sh6 billion to stay afloat.

“My line didn’t work from 2011 to 2012. It has again been dead for months this year. And my numerous calls to Telkom yield only one response: ‘Our engineers are working on it’.”

Unable to bear it any longer, he has voted with his money to a competitor, Airtel. His advice to Telkom? “Provide efficient services and your cash flow will automatically improve.”

Have a reliable day, won’t you!

E-mail: watchman@nation.co.ke or write to Watchman, 
PO BOX 49010, Nairobi 00100. 
Fax 2213946.